where are you saturday?

three pm. saturday can't come soon enough.

i wish i could just end my classes as of week 10 and take that grade instead of going through the agony of finals.

the library is packed, and people scribble desperate pleas on their desks. every customer at the arbor absent-mindedly pays for their drinks, but then forgets to actually take it with them out of the store. finals drive everyone insane, very slowly.

i'm crossing my fingers for my final at noon on saturday. crossing them until they turn white. i've never NEEDED a grade as much as i need this one. there's so much that's riding on a few bubble-in multiple choice questions. argh!

so about that studying, i should get back to that. yes!

mkushi, zambia to goleta, california

i received a letter from my cousin Ryan today. he's currenly vounteering for the peace corps in mkushi, zambia. i think he's been there for about 8 months. i was so excited to get his letter, because i'd sent him a card in early february. and my mind was racing, trying to figure out if he'd got it or not. i think it takes about 20 days to get mail from zambia to here, and vice versa. all the time in-between makes you wonder what's really happening. second-guessing ensues.

it sounds like he's doing alright. he was worried about taking his malaria meds because they contain quanine, side effects unknown. I was asking him about art in mkushi and he said that there isn't art in the traditional sense. he says that "living in a place where nearly everything (bricks, guitars, ovens, reed floor mats, tables, chairs, dresses + suits, axes, hoes, houses, drums, to name a few) is made by hand gives me a whole new respect for anything that takes refined craftsmanship." a lot of the time i feel silly writing about my life here, when thousands of miles away he's experiencing things that i can't even begin to grasp or imagine. i'm going to keep writing though. letters are a way of holding on even when you realize you have to let go.

i feel like if anyone could adapt to another culture's lifestyle and emerse themselves in another world, it would be Ryan.

flowers, dinosaurs, and eyeballs, oh my!

this is what goes on inside my head when i'm daydreaming. a series of pictures juxtaposed together. separate and distinct. nothing really makes sense. but ideas that ricochet inside your mind shouldn't have to. they're inner ramblings.

image (c) 2006 hillary.